Indescribable

God moves in such incredible ways. Tonight He filled me up with sooo much joy and love and thanksgiving. My deepest desire is that Everyone would know God so truly and feel His Loving Presence in them. There is nothing better, let me tell ya. All this to bring soo much glory to God! Ah! :)

Sooo, where to start. This afternoon, it was a gorgeous day outside, so I sat out on the deck, talking to my mom and relaxing. She started reading, so I decided to have some God time. Opened up my Bible, decided I would read Psalm 50 because a friend had mentioned it to me recently, starting reading... and my phone kept going off. It decided to receive all the texts I should have gotten in the last 24 hours all at once. Hokay. So then I was distracted for about 15 minutes. Finally I turned back to my Bible. After I quickly read through Psalm 50, I noticed this: "Offer to God a sacrifice of thanksgiving...those who bring thanksgiving as their sacrifice honor me..." (:14a, :23a). I sighed a deep sigh and turned to my Father God in prayer. I needed to step back and draw near to Him, thanking Him for the day, repenting of my sins and distractions, asking help to focus and re-center my thoughts and life on Him, and resting in His presence. (Sometimes it seems easier to seek God on a beautiful-weather day...when I can physically see His glory, His glorious Creation, all around me).

God and I had some good chat time. Then I read the Crucifixion and Resurrection in Luke, chapters 23-24. It's so powerful. I got really into it, like when reading a really good book (hmm! ;) or watching a really intense movie. (It's so much easier to see it so real after seeing those stories and emotions acted out in the Riverside mime each week). I'm learning so much about God's faithfulness. He never gives up on His people. He never gives up on us, no matter what! We can always be restored, remade, renewed again. I hope to become even more faithful to Him! I also read James 1:19-2:26 -- lately something that's been standing out to me is the true freedom that Christ offers us. John 8:32. Being a Christian doesn't always look that freeing from the outside -- we have a King to obey and "rules". But, truth is, we GET to serve our Eternal King. Before, we were all slaves to sin, to our own way of life, and sin had it's grip held tightly on us. Addictions, hopelessness, failure, lies... but Jesus truly FREES us from all of that when He died once for all time for our sins so that "sin has lost its power, death has lost its sting." Now we can be free, made new, forgiven, slate wiped clean! "From the grave You've risen, Victoriously"! [We sang that tonight -- "Marvelous Light" - awesome song.]

Also, I'm realizing that life is super stressful when I try to take control of life on my own, trying to figure everything out and plan out my future correctly and make the best decisions... puts a lot of pressure on me! And I mess it up. BUT it's sooo freeing to let go, to give up, to hand all of my life to God's hands and ask Him to lead. I have hope that He will direct my path exactly as He wants to for His perfect purpose, so I can surrender and listen and pray and know that He has me covered! Ahh soo awesome.

Anyway, (wow this is getting long already, sorry! :), then I went on a refreshing bike ride, and you know- bike rides are a great time to seek God in prayer and enjoy His presence! Then I got to meet a college friend for dinner, and that was sooo awesome to catch up! Afterward, she and I met up with another awesome sister-in-Christ and we drove up to see the Riverside mime together tonight.

Being back at Riverside (after a "grueling" 6 days at home ;) was such a blessing -- it was like a reunion with all my amazing counselor friends. The unity of our staff must be a direct result of our focus on God, because He is at work in those relationships. It was such a joy to seek everyone, and be welcomed, and feel the love.

God truly spoke through the mime ministry tonight, as always. It was cool seeing it after being in it- sometimes I caught myself analyzing it a little bit, but the emotions I felt were crazy. (OK the awesome thing about seeing the mime multiple times is that something different stands out to me every time). Tonight what caught me was the celebration during Palm Sunday, during the song "Funky Jesus Music". Last time, when I acted as a Pharisee, I had to act super ticked off and "shout" at the crowds to 'be quiet!!' This time it felt weird to cheer during that part. lol.

The end is always amazing with the Resurrection and the restored relationships between Jesus and all those who had sinned against Him. He wiped some of His white face paint on them and showed them that they were still LOVED by THE KING and were still so valuable to His Kingdom!! Because they simply repented, admitted they needed to be forgiven by Jesus, He transformed their lives anew and sent them out to make disciples. Amen!

Tonight what really hit me were the real-life applications from this. We all need to be restored in some way. Christ restored my focus today, to give ALL glory to Him for this awesome summer, and seek to glorify Him in everything I do. :D He died for you. He died for me. We are given new life! And He loves us sooo much! Just like Jesus embraced the "humanity" character so tightly in the mime, no matter how much she made mistakes AND how long she held onto her temptations and sins when all she needed to do the whole time was let go of them and give them to Jesus, He still loved her the WHOLE TIME! "But God demonstrates His own love for us in this, that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us."! Ahhh what a glorious story. It never gets old.

I also experienced God's power and love through true godly relationships. After the mime, I was filled with so much energy, from the Holy Spirit and His presence in this story, in this place, and through the awesome counselors with humble, willing, serving spirits to let God work this through them tonight. I wanted to jump for joy while we sang "Marvelous Light", and I did during "Happy Day", and then I felt the powerful love of Christ and my friends as I shared hugs with them afterward. Here's a powerful truth- Christ does not judge us for anything if we ask for help -- He died for those things that weigh us down. He loves us no matter what, accepts us for who we are, and gives us NEW LIFE again through His love and His risen life!!! And another cool thing is -- when we put our trust in Him, He lives in and through us to reach others, and I felt Christ's Spirit pouring through my friend's hearts to touch mine tonight. Thank YOU! Ahh!!

Then we got to worship, to spend blessed time with God and each other, on the car ride home, to awesome songs like "Light up the Sky" and "Saving Grace by The Afters, and "O Praise Him" by David Crowder Band. [Look up those lyrics sometime -- sooo true and awesome!!] My two friends and I stopped at my house and watched some videos, shared some laughs, and reveled in the joys of the night and God's awesome story... it never gets old!

We listened to the first song of the mime, "Faithful" by Fee, and ahhh amazing. Then Kierstin and I had an awesome God talk, and sometimes we couldn't even find words and didn't even need to use them -- we both looked at each other and screamed and knew the feeling was mutual. "When we don't know how to pray as we ought, the very Spirit of God intercedes for us with sighs too deep for words." Romans...something. Love it. I just felt soooo thankful to God for who. He. is. He created us, loved us, redeemed us, ... let me work at Riverside this summer, meet awesome people in my life, grow in Him, get to serve kids!... nothing good that I have is by my own doing, it is all thanks to God. John 15:5 came to mind today - "'I am the vine, you are the branches,' [Jesus said], 'those who abide in me and I in them bear much fruit, because apart from me, you can do nothing.'" THANK YOU, JESUS for giving me the opportunity to live for You and serve You and be part of Your glorious story and perfect plan for all time! And guess what -- YOU. ARE. TOO! You are a child of God, valued in His sight, no matter what good or bad things have gone on in your life. God loves you and wants to restore you and use you! Will you accept? :)

God's presence to all! Good night! <3